Wednesday, December 1, 2010

When I get ahold of a good book, I devour it. It's like this force I cannot stop-- not even to eat or sleep. Why? Because I want to know how it ends. I never look at the last page first or anything like that, I appreciate the journey it takes to get to the conclusion, but man- I really really really want to know the ending.
This week I have thought a lot about my future. I'm graduating in about six months with a degree in English. Everyone who hears this automatically asks me if I want to teach. And no, I don't. I tried that route, it's not my thing. So what do I want to do with it? I haven't the foggiest idea. I like the idea of editing, I've even taken the time to look into some jobs in that area. This route would take me to a city- probably New York.
Then there's always the option of staying around Wilmore/Lexington, and trying to find a full-time job here, even if this option is just to help me get on my own two feet.
Then there's Chicago. It's a city I love, plus it's close to home.
There are so many different ways my life could turn out. In seven months, I could be.... anywhere. Absolutely anywhere.
And for the person who loves to know the endings of stories, it's killing me.

It's not a matter of not trusting God. I do. Or at least I'm learning. And every time I start to become too concerned, He always reminds me that he's got it under control. But that doesn't stop me from wanting to know. Just... wanting the conclusion. See how it all wraps up. See what state I'm living in, for heaven's sake!

I'm in the middle of the journey, and I can't see the end of the road for the life of me. And on days like today, it's a little bit frustrating. And exciting.


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